


My Immortal Grandfather

by kyleron



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens (2015)
Genre: Angst, Crack, F/M, True Love, yes I did rewrite My Immortal from Kylo Ren's perspective I'm so sorry
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-12-28
Updated: 2015-12-28
Packaged: 2018-05-09 23:20:38
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 1,166
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5559706
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kyleron/pseuds/kyleron
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Kylo Ren unexpectedly finds his one true love, who is none other than............ Ebony Dark'ness Dementia Raven Way!</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Late on Christmas night I was browsing Tumblr, saw a Tumblr post and had the worst idea ever.  
> Credit goes to:  
> Tumblr user nymphofnovels for coming up with this idea,  
> Tumblr user scriptscribbles for making a [post](http://scriptscribbles.tumblr.com/post/135922551016/new-otp-kylo-renebony-darkness-dementia-raven) about it,  
> and to whoever wrote My Immortal.
> 
> fangz 4 kudos and STOP FLAGGING DA STORY PREPZ OR I WILL DESTROI UR HOME PLANET!!!111!

Hi my name is Kylo Ren and I have long ebony black hair and dark brown eyes like black holes and a lot of people tell me I am just like Darth Vader (AN: if u don’t know who he is get da hell out of here!). I am NOT related to Han Solo (I AM NOT) (HE SUCKS) (HE IS A TERRIBLE FATHER) (THERE IS NO CONNECTION BETWEEN US). I’m a goth (in case you couldn’t tell) and I wear only black. I love Hoth Topic and I get all my clothes from there. For example today I was wearing a black mask and a black robe with a black cloak. I was wearing black eyeliner and black nail polish that you could not see because of my mask and my black leather gloves. I was walking outside Starkiller Base. It was snowing and raining and there was no sun because we were harnessing its power to power up the Starkiller Base and I was really happy about both the lack of sun and the prospect of destroying yet another planet. A bunch of Jedi stared at me. I have no idea how or why since both my grandfather (DARTH VADER!!!!) and I have killed pretty much all of them, but I put up my middle finger at them anyways.

“Hey Kylo!” shouted a voice. I looked up. It was… Ebony Dark’ness Dementia Raven Way! I had no clue how exactly I ended up knowing her name because I have never seen her before but I just knew. She was the most goffik person I have ever seen (except for me because I am the most goffik person in the entire galaxy but she was a close second). She had long ebony black hair (I suppose that’s how she got her name) with purple streaks and red tips that reached her mid-back and icy blue eyes like limpid tears and my first thought was that she looked like Amy Lee (I don’t know who she is though). She did not seem to be related to Gerard Way (I don’t know who he is either but he is a major fucking hottie!). The scent of blood that surrounded her seemed to hint at the fact that she was a vampire. She had pale white skin. She was also a witch! Today she was wearing a black corset with matching lace around it and a black leather miniskirt, pink fishnets and black combat boots. She was wearing black lipstick, white foundation, black eyeliner and red eye shadow.

“I love it when there’s no sun” said she. I was opening my mouth but Hux called me and I had to go away.


	2. Chapter 2

The next day I woke up in my bedroom. It was snowing and raining again. I opened the door of my coffin (Hux told me that I need to sleep in a coffin in order to be goffik) and took off my giant Darth Vader t-shirt which I used for pyjamas. Instead, I put on my black shirt, black pants, black robe and black cloak, and put on the leather gloves for a nice finishing touch. Just as I was putting on my mask, Hux woke up and grinned at me. He ran his hand through his red hair and opened his blue eyes.

“So, you and that girl you talked to yesterday.”

“Enoby?”

“That’s the one. Do you like her?”

“No I fucking don’t!” I screamed as we walked out of the Starkiller Base.

“Yeah right” Hux yelled.

“HUX I WILL BLOW UP YOUR FUCKING PLANET IF YOU KEEP- oh hi Ebony” I said shyly. She was standing right in front of me, looking very emo in her black leather dress, a pentagram necklace, combat boots and black fishnets.

“Hi” she said flirtily. “Guess what?”

“What?” I said depressively.

“The Cantina Band is having a concert in Tatooine!”

“OH. MY. FUCKING. VADER!” I screamed. I did not give two shits about the Cantina Band but Tatooine was where my grandfather I mean Darth Vader was from. I could not just let such an opportunity pass!

“Well……………… do you want to go with me?” Ebony asked.

I GASPED.


	3. Chapter 3

On the night of the concert I put on my black boots, black pants, black jacket and a black robe with a black cloak on top of it. I was wearing my black gloves and a black mask. Then I felt a little depressed so I threw a temper tantrum. I prayed to Darth Vader for strength and so I was ready to go to the concert I mean to Tatooine.

I went outside. Enoby was waiting there in front of her freighter. She was wearing black lace-up boots with high heels, underneath them were ripped red fishnets. She wore a black leather minidress with all this corset stuff on the back and front. She had a matching fishnet on her arms. She straightened her hair and made it look all spiky.

“Hi Ebony” I said goffikly.

“Hi Kyle” she replied lovingly.

We walked into her freighter. The license plate said 666 on it (do they even have license plates? Who knows? Ebony’s had). We flew to Tatooine. On the way we listened to Darth Vader’s theme. We smoked cigarettes and drugs. When we got there we went to the mosh pit at the front of the stage and jumped up and down.

“Ta ta ta ta tatata  
Tatatatatata ta  
Ta ta ta ta tatata  
Tatatatatata TA”

“Anyways, Darth Vader is so fucking hot” I said to Enoby while we were moshing.

Suddenly she looked sad.

“Let’s go explore more of Tatooine, maybe we can find the house he lived in!” I said.

We crawled back into her freighter, but Ebony did not go looking for Darth Vader’s house. Instead she flew it to………… a forest in Naboo!


	4. Chapter 4

“EBONY!” I shouted. “What in the name of Darth Vader do you think you’re doing?”

She did not answer but instead stopped the freighter and walked out of it. I walked out too.

“This is Naboo, this is where he lived for a while, I guess it should suffice too” I said.

“Kyle…” she said sexily.

“What?” I said confusedly.

She leaned in extra close and before I could say anything we were kissing passionately.

“Oh… KYLO…” she moaned as she took off my mask. Then I put my thingy into her you-know-what. By thingy I mean my COOL RED LIGHTSABER that goes into THREE DIRECTIONS because it’s SPECIAL and by you-know-what I mean her heart. No one shall prevent me from finding out more about Darth Vader, not even the love of my life. Speaking of that, as I saw the life leave her icy blue eyes, I realised that she was the love of my life so I felt a little depressed and slit my wrists with my lightsaber. However, the wounds were immediately cauterised so I sighed and called Hux, asking him to take me back home.


End file.
